Reality Check

 So this is really how I like to think of my 19 year old. Yup, about 5 years old, dressed up in her favorite princess costume, headed to go and see Beauty and the Beast live. Below is a pic of her and her other two gorgeous sisters this past Easter. And yes, I did make them dress up in similar outfits, because again, it gives me that piece of fairy-tale, it is a perfect life that I so desperately long for, yet never have been able to achieve. (let me know if you have, because I want to know your secret!)

 I got an ugly dose of reality this summer, one I really was not prepared for. I was face to face with a teenager who is used to freedom at college, not really ready to be back home with rules and curfews. A teenager who really loves to party and is now, much to my dismay smoking, among other things, and really doesn't have much use for her parents, except for us to pay for stuff. The rational, semi-healthy side of me says, "it's a phase, you did stuff your mom would have died over too" (sorry mom, at least you never found out!) and the other part of me wants to jump into what I see as her drowning in the depths of the ocean (even though I am terrified of the depths of the ocean) and rescue her from what I see as mistakes being made.

Our girl is SMART, going to school on a scholarship, and she works hard and her professors love her, and so do her friends.This past weekend I moved her back to college for her sophomore year. She was dying to get back and I was happy for her because she attends and amazing university in one of the most beautiful locations in the country, but I have to admit that I was a bit melancholy at the thought of not seeing her on a daily basis for several months. Although she is not very outwardly affectionate, she is my first born, and of course, one of the true loves of my life. Yesterday as we were finishing up with her move in, I was slapped in the face with the harsh reality that those feelings are just not mutual, and I guess that is normal. She is supposed to someday fall in love (hopefully with someone who loves God and her beyond measure, and treats her like gold, and if he were a genius, that would be a bonus!), be gaga over her own kids, and live a great life. I have to admit that I drove home alone and cried most of the way, for 4 1/2 hours on and off, no joke, and then proceeded to smother the two "babies" (13 & 16) that I have left at home once I arrived. I then crawled into my bed, with an extra large glass of wine, watched some football and fell asleep feeling quite sorry for myself.

This morning as I was working and going over my notes from an event I attended, I ran across something that was said in one of my classes. The quote reads "If you are willing to suffer, then you will be willing to do the work of God." This really hit home with me. Suffering is just part of parenthood, plain and simple. Anything we truly do for the Kingdom of God will involve suffering, and as parents, we truly do not have a more important job than that of raising our kids. Truth be told, they are just temporarily on loan to us anyway. I know it is time for me to STEP BACK (my friend Clay, who has no children of his own affectionately calls me a helicopter mom, he has no idea what that really is, but I know reading this will make him happy), and just keep praying. We have loved her deeply, raised her well, given her good values, and now, it is time to give her the space to make her own way. She loves us just the way she is supposed to, and I am grateful God chose to loan her out to us.

So to all of you parents out there who may be struggling with this, you are not alone. Feel your feelings and then move on. This is the circle of life, and we are along for the wild ride, so we should at least try to enjoy it!

Tis the Season ~

 

I  know that I have not blogged in ages, but tonight I felt so compelled that I knew I had to do it.  So very much is on my heart, and for me, there is never a better way to make things better, than to write.  So here I am emotionally blogging, which is better than me emotionally eating or drinking, and I have been known to do both, so hopefully this will be the best decision for my emotional well being.

I think it all started bubbling over when I called my Baba in CA to wish her a Happy Thanksgiving.  She will be turning 90 at the end of January & it was one of the saddest conversations that I have ever had with her.   Let's just say her health is not so great.  She is nearly deaf  & has only been able to see out of one eye, but she is quickly loosing her sight, which they have now realized is from a tumor on her cornea, and surgery may not be an option because of her age.  So needless to say, it was not a fun conversation.  She is so precious; she is one of the smartest & most brave women I know, still sharp as a tack, but so very frightened, which nearly shattered my heart.  Below are a couple of my favorite pictures of her from a trip we took back out to CA a couple of years ago. 



 And now we get to today....down to the nitty-gritty, and my breaking point.  Moving.  Yup we are moving.  Thankfully not out of KY, or even Lexington for that matter, but we are moving.  We have decided to downsize; imagine that in this day & age.  I thought I was really ok with it until we started moving things over to our new home, and really started taking the BIG stuff, and then today my amazing  mother-in-law posted a picture from her annual chocolate party, and I cried like a baby.  For real, like a baby.  Something about that picture made me so sad.  You see, the chocolate party was something that was around long before I was in the picture 20+ years ago.  It was something she did wither her mom, a.k.a. Granny, and with all the girls in the family & then when I married Charley, I was invited, and as we all had daughters, they came too.  Along the way we sadly lost loved ones and then 9 years ago, we moved away.  Bette's party this year was with just cousin Lisa & cousin Valerie  & for the first time, their husbands. 

It showed that we had entered a new stage in our lives, and it just made me very sad and miss them very much.  For the first time in 9 years, I really felt "homesick" .  Homesick for my Baba, my family and for my friends back in CA.

 This is all of us a couple of years ago.  We had a summer chocolate party

 And some of my best girlfriends back in CA.

 

So I went to the new house and did one of the things I do best, and love to do; decorate our Christmas tree.  Now, I pretty much cried the whole time I did it because most of the ornaments hold such special memories, but it made me feel closer to the people that I love that are far away, and I know that I need to make our new house feel like home, and this is one of the best ways that I know how to do that.

 Cousin Lisa gave me that heart ornament too many years ago to remember when, but I love it just as much today, as I did on the night I opened it at the chocolate party.

 And cousin Valerie gave me a set of 3 of these precious candy containers that I absolutely cherish & one day, I know my girls will each cherish theirs that I pass each on to them. 

 

They say that "there's no place like home for the holidays" but home is not only where your heart is, but who you keep in it too.  Time passes and things change, but love remains the same.  I am so grateful for my amazing family & friends & most of all, our three precious daughters that I am blessed to spend each day with.  God is good, all the time, and the best is yet to come!

 

Merry Christmas & God Bless you,

Sanya

 

Showing A Little Leg

My friend Polly called me yesterday morning and asked if I felt like taking a spontaneous ride up to Cincinnati to do a little bit of window shopping with her. The completion of Polly's custom Jimmy Nash home is just a few weeks away and she is just itching to start her furniture selections. I love watching Polly when she is in shopping mode; I can see the wheels turning in her head and I enjoy her passion for the hunt! Well, it was a beautiful fall day, so how could I possibly pass up what I knew would be great company, beautiful scenery on our ride, and fun to boot? Little did I know that I would be the one to come home with a shopping bag, but I am SO happy that I did! I found these fabulously chic heavy linen pleated slip covers and I fell in love with them right away! Being that they were at the Ballard Designs Outlet for only $19.00 a piece made them a no-brainer! I replaced my pretty Shabby Chic white floor length damask slip covers that I have had for YEARS, with these for a fresh more modern chic look. I absolutely LOVE the way the legs of the chairs are now exposed and I also adore the way they pull the grey tone out of my wallpaper and rug and give the room an extra pop of color.

If you want to see what's going on during Polly's custom home build, you can take a peek at her blog at http://polly-pollyshouse.blogspot.com Polly has a wonderful way with words, and her taste is fabulous, so I know that you will really enjoy reading about her journey and seeing the pictures as well.

Ciao for now,

Sanya

The Sweetest Thing

When my precious niece Kristen was born 22 years ago this past April, I was so in love with her and beside myself over her being born into our family, that I had never really thought about her getting married someday. Kristen was like my first born child. We are a really "tight" family; what's mine is yours, and what's yours is mine kind of thing, and children are no exception. We love deeply in our family and she was everything I had ever imagined, and as she grew, and grew, and grew, that never changed. Kristen has never stopped being "Tetka's Princess" and one of the greatest loves of my life. That sweet and precious baby girl is all grown up now. She just graduated from Auburn University in Alabama, Suma Cum Laude I might add, and an amazing young woman. She is an amazing dancer and uses her gift to teach and inspire others.

There is so much I can say about my brother's first born, but I think by now you all see that she is amazing and loved immensely! When Kristen asked me to do the flowers for her wedding I was so honored. Her husband Jon's Aunt Michelle is an amazing local florist in Alabama as well as an incredible event planner, so to say the least I was touched. Kristen wanted simple elegance and more than anything, I wanted to give her that. We had sooooo much fun picking out the flowers together, and let me tell you, seeing the excitement in her eyes in that huge cooler at the flower wholesaler was such a treat. Kristen is such a happy person, so excited about everything, passionate and life loving, that all of this was such a joy!

Kristen wanted her bouquet to be romantic and elegant and she hand picked each flower herself, so it was easy for me to put it together for her. Excellent taste runs in the family, but seeing her face when she saw her bouquet was priceless, and something I will never forget!

The Roman Catholic Church in Montgomery that Kristen and Jon were married in is spectacular as you can see, so it did not need much in the way of decor. Just simple rose orbs and small bouquets of white flowers.

Another great part of this wedding was having our family together. This is my gorgeous mom, Jovanka, with Kristen and my other beautiful niece Michelle.

And this is my other precious niece Veronica. She is such a love; she and I were slow dancing at the reception and I whispered to her that it looked like she was having a great time, and she told me that it was the best day of her life. I cried!

I just love this picture, it makes my heart smile!

This is another of my favorites.

The smile on Kristen's face is always there. It is one of the things that I love most about her. She is a joyous person and that just spills over onto everyone around her. Her happiness is contagious! They waited 4 years for this!

This wedding was truly a family affair; Kristen's Godfather, Al made the wedding cake for Kristen and Jon as a gift. I just got to have fun doing the finishing touches.

I had to finish with this photo. This is Kristen dancing with her maternal grandfather. Their faces say it all. When people asked me to tell them about the wedding I told them all the same thing. It was THE SWEETEST wedding I have ever been to. There was so much LOVE and the two of them were SO HAPPY and GIDDY that my heart will always be full from the memory of that day. I will for always remember them being pronounced man and wife and the way that they held onto one another in the sweetest hug. I could go on for days and tell you one memory after another of sweet moments, but I will stop and just say that I wish everyone the same joy and memories that our family had on that magical day, May 21, 2110.

Thank you my sweet Kristen and Jonny for they way you love each other and for allowing us all to share it with you.

Love,

Tetka

Can You Ever Have Too Many Flowers on Your Kitchen Table?

Spring in Kentucky is absolutely stunning and I have the allergy problems to attest to it, but it is all worth it to have abundance like this in your own yard, available to you at any time for your pleasure!! I am one of those people that likes to take full advantage of what is in our yard to add to the beauty of our home inside. Whenever I buy a plant I always think about what it will be able to produce for our pleasure inside as well as outside. Abundance always helps. And to be honest, I will take as much as I please from the outside and bring it in. Now, don't get me wrong, I LOVE when the neighbors are all out walking and they stop to admire the yard, but it doesn't stop me from going to town with the clippers to have fresh flowers in the our bathrooms and other rooms in our home. As I was clipping the lilac tree on the side of the house yesterday I could hardly contain myself that I actually had such beauty growing right in my own back yard!!!

So when we are blessed with having such incredible beauty in our yards, I encourage you to clip some and bring it in and enjoy it! You can see I went to town on our crab apple trees, but I figure it is good pruning and I always tell myself that it is because I clip them so much for my indoor arrangements that they look so pretty each year when they blossom!

Viburnum, this puffy green ball that almost looks like a mini hydrangea is one of my most favorite plants in the whole yard, and I have decided that I am going to let mine get really BIG! You can keep them small or let them grow like a tree, so I am going to see where ours goes. I figure that the larger I let it get, the more abundance of flowers I have for the house!

Seeing our girls faces when they came home from school and into the kitchen for homework and snack was icing on the cake for me. It touches my heart so much that they love flowers as much as I do and that they can appreciate the blessings from God that we have in our own back yard.

I hope I have encouraged you to go out into your own yard and create something beautiful of your own, you never know what you may find!

Sanya~

What's Been Going On

I feel very blessed and loved that so many of you have sent me personal emails wondering where in the world I have been and letting me know that you miss my blogging and posts. It is quite humbling to me and I feel very blessed and my heart feels quite full, so thank you!!!

I have been very fortunate this year to be busy with weddings and other aspects of my floral business, so I thought I would share some photos of some of the work I have done recently. I would love to hear your feedback, so please do not hesitate to post your comments on the blog, I always LOVE hearing from you!

I hope you enjoy these!

With love,

Sanya

Roscoe-Vitali Wedding March 20, 2009

The isle flowers were in pretty white tin cones tied to the pews with hot pink ribbon.

The garden outside of the church had a heart wreath of baby's breath with baby's breath bouquets flanking the entrance.

The altar flowers below...

The bridal party flowers looked stunning in this tall pedestal etched vase.

Who wouldn't love a pink cake???

I just LOVED doing the arrangements for the urns in front of the church! I filled them with blooming cherry & peach tree branches. The wreaths on the doors were made of baby's breath, and looked so soft and beautiful!

The bridal party bouquets. Stunning, if I do say so myself!!!

The wedding centerpieces consisted of pink narine lilies, pink peonies, pink dahlia's and Esperance roses.

The corsages.

I had planned on adding more pictures of other weddings, but when I did, they went right to the top of the page & I could not move them around, so I think I will have to do a new post with other pictures.

It's Finally Done!

Well for those of you who follow my blog, you know that we had some serious damage from the ice storm a few months ago. It was not fun living through the construction, especially trying to run a home based business with clients who I normally meet here in our home, which I absolutely could not do, and the other thing I really missed was entertaining our friends and family. But now it is finally all done and I could place my pretties back, although I did move things around a bit. A new rug in the entry, with a lamp added to the table as well, I love it.In our office I moved some things around as well. I brought up a mirror from the basement to put behind my desk with some sconces I had up in the attic that have not seen daylight for the past 5 years, and we also brought up the piano. The room is a lot cozier and I love listening to Charley and the girls play the piano each night. So life once again, it back to normal, I had a great meeting with a new bride last week and was able to book her wedding, so all is well again in our happy little home.

Thank you for all of your good thoughts and kind emails while we went through this process, it meant the world to me!
Love,
Sanya

Out of Sight, Out of Mind...

I learned something very interesting about my kids a couple of weeks ago that I thought I would pass along to the rest of you. You see, I am a "fruit in the fridge" kind of gal. I love a crisp cold apple as well as a nice cold juicy orange, so that is where I have always put our fruit as soon as I came home from the market. Well a couple of weeks ago we had a ton of food for some reason which didn't leave me any room in the fridge for the fruit, so I just placed it all into bowls on the kitchen counter. I was shocked that within 3 days it was all gone. Apples, bananas, pears, the oranges, all of it! They went for the fruit in front of their faces instead of going into the pantry for a salty, perhaps, less healthy snack, and I found that all their little friends that are always over followed suite. And you know what else? We adults ate more of it too.



I guess the point to this post, is break out your pretty bowls and fill them with some delicious fruit and nuts and maybe the same thing will happen in your home.

XO~
Sanya

Is It Just Me???

I don't know about the rest of you, but I feel like I am constantly fighting a never ending battle to get our girls to put their things away where they belong, and quite frankly, they just seem too old now not to be able to do it themselves & do it properly while they are at it! Below is a photo of the desk in our kitchen where the girls do homework, crafts, draw, work on the computer, etc. and I am sure that many of you may just pass out from the sight, but I am secretly hoping that I am not alone in this struggle. And dealing with this mess while our home is in the state that it is from the construction....
like this photo below with two rooms combined into one, I am feeling a bit unnerved at any mess, even if it is a pair of shoes that haven't been put away, or a folder that belongs in a backpack or Barbie's that didn't make it back upstairs.

I feel like a new person now that I bit the bullet and cleaned up the mess myself. I will tell you honestly that I am going to iron fist the girls with a serious guilt trip talking to when they get home as well as bit of fear thrown it for good measure. All 3 girls always just love how pretty everything looks when it is clean and organized, but then they can't seem to bring themselves to put the markers, pencils, scrap paper, coloring books, etc. back where they belong, no matter how many containers I put on the desk for them, so I am not sure what the answer is!

In the mean time, I think I will just enjoy this space for the way it is for today, because I know that for today, it will be clean, pretty, and organized, and who knows what tomorrow will bring!

Sending you clutter free wishes,
Sanya

A Belated Valentine

A Happy Belated Valentine's Day to all. I was very grateful to be be busy with lots of Valentine's day flower orders this year. One of my favorites is in the photo below....

But I have been receiving some very thoughtful and loving emails wondering where in the world I am and if all is okay. Well, thankfully I am here, at home, although it is quite torn apart. We had some serious damage to our home from the ice storm last month and it will be quite a long process to get it all taken care of. In the mean time, we have furniture in rooms that they don't belong in (note the mess in the backdrop of the photo above), and Valerie displaced from her bedroom.....I KNOW it could be SO much worse, but it is still a lot to deal with and looking at the damage day in and day out gets a bit overwhelming. Below are some photos of the process. They don't even begin to show all of the damage...

Entry & living room/my workspace...

Living room ceiling & staircase

Valerie Jane's room...yes, that is the sky you see through that hole! It is hard to believe that something so small could create SO MUCH damage!

Needless to say, we are counting our blessings, and are extremely thankful for home owners insurance, and great contractors! I am telling myself each day that patience is a virtue and that all will go back in place soon enough, it is so small in the big scheme of things. Fortunately this does not seem to be phasing our girls, they are rolling with the punches and are as happy as ever. They are all working me now to change bedrooms and redecorate.....One day at a time!

I hope you all had a wonderful Valentine's Day & I hope you know that you are always near and dear to my heart!

Love & Blessings,

Sanya